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Memorable quotes for
"The Flight of the Conchords"
Yoko (2007)

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Murray: Alright, Item A: Gig. Oh, a gig.

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[in the middle of the Second Annual Flight of the Conchords Fan Club meeting]
Murray: Alright, Item 3. Now if one of the band members was to have a girlfriend, would you find that... A: Very Positive; B: Positive...
Mel: Why do... why do you ask?
Murray: No reason.
Mel: Has Bret got a girlfriend?
Murray: Yes. He's seeing a girl from work. Coko.
Mel: [snaps the tip of her pencil, twitches nervously, then recovers] Oh... heh. Wow. Well that's great that Bret has a girlfriend. That's really great.
Murray: You don't think that Bret's any less available now that he's...
Mel: Oh no... heh. Is she pretty?
Murray: You're still interested in the band then? Even though...
Mel: Yes, it's nice for Bret to have a girlfriend.
Murray: Good.
Mel: Yes.
Murray: Alright. You're sure?
Mel: Yes!
[chuckles]
Mel: Is she stupid?
Murray: You've still got Jemaine anyway. And he's always available, isn't he? He's not gonna... not gonna get a girlfriend any time soon, so...
Mel: Just ummm...
Murray: Try your chances with him, can't you?
Mel: Mmmhmm. Does... does Bret's girlfriend look anything like me? A bit?
Murray: A little bit. 'Round the eyes.
Mel: Oh yeah? Big eyes, huh?
Murray: Well she's... she's got eyes.

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Bret: If you say that again, I'm gonna throw this sandwich at your face.

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Murray: You don't go on other people’s dates! You get your own dates, Jemaine.

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Jemaine: How come you don't tickle me anymore, Bret?

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Jemaine: [after following Bret and Coco onto a bus] Bret.
Bret: [surprised] Hey man, what are you doing here?
Jemaine: Murray and I missed you and we want you to rejoin the band again.
Bret: Really?
Jemaine: Yeah, on one condition, that you...
[makes hand to throat gesture and points at Coco]
Bret: I'm not gonna kill her man.
Jemaine: No just leave - just leave her not...
Bret: Oh, no I'm not gonna leave her, I told you that. You know, I like the band but, no, I'm not leaving Coco
Coko: I wouldn't mind, I mean if that's what you really want.
Bret: Shush Baby.
Coko: I-I don't really see us as a long-term...
Bret: Shush.
Jemaine: So what's it gonna be Bret, the girl or the band?
Bret: Well, it’s gonna be Coco.
Jemaine: Oh, are you sure?
Bret: Yeah.
Jemaine: Oh, I thought you - I was sure you were gonna say the band.
Bret: [Shakes head] No I'm staying with Coco.
Jemaine: [sighs] I guess you can still be in the band.
Bret: Okay, yeah all right.
Jemaine: Okay.
Bret: Cool.
Jemaine: Okay, well I'll see you later.
[gets up to leave]
Bret: I'll see you at band practice.
Jemaine: [sits down Again] Actually I'm gonna wait until the bus stops and then I'll get off.

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